1. UN PREDITED FUTURE HAPPINIES

All men want a perfect life. But all men have to know, in this world nothing is perfect except in heaven. Among the many things that want to be perfect, there is one that all human endeavor, for close to perfect, which is love.

That's where myself and wife story begins. At a time when everything seems to be almost perfect, that is when the Lord Allah brings His test. Tests were at first made me think, where's my fault? What is my sin that I do this?

But in the end I got it, God tests His fall was to make love to my wife, close to perfect. Perfect love that does not place conditions. Love does not have to be pretty, do not have a voice sweet, smiling graciously need not, and should not hug me too, I will still respond with love.

This is how my story begins.

On August 21, 1980, I heard those words and forceful this with gratitude and joy.

"Sah!"

"Sah!"

Thank God, finally I became a husband to a most beautiful woman in my eyes. Women who have been stealing my hearts for so long, and on that day, legally she is my wife. Life was held at the beginning of sweets and happy.

" Bang,  I love you " the expression of my wife on the first night.

"Who does not love."

"Yes, Darling?"

"I swear, Darling."

We both smiled happily. And for almost 20 years God lent my wife and I, who named sweet things. We live together undergo the '80s and' 90s with the ups and downs. We are fed by God, beginning on 1 September appointed as an Administrative Officer’s,   with a little treasure that we collect, and then the sustenance bestowed by Allah with invaluable - children. Children are a testament to our love and bonding. So much so that we had to raise both hands to count the number, and that is seven. Four sons and three daughters. Our family life, thank God blessed with happiness and joy as it is.

Until the date of March 2, 2001, my wife had to be hospitalized for neurosurgery. Something I did not expect. Something I did not know, and never even know it exists because of her illness since we consolidated  she never ill, except occasional colds. The most frequent abdominal pain is  front stomach boom due to contains children almost once a year at first and in the alternate three years after the third birth and so on until the seventh birth..

" Your wife Mr. Nik affected by the disease,  associated with the genetic potential out of 100 thousand to 150 thousand people who suffer from this disease.   This disease medically is known as   "artery -venous malformation" (AVM). "

At a time when the doctor told me the problem, I still do not feel anything. In case of cancer or heart disease, still I can imagine the danger, but not the disease. A mystery to me, strange diseases related to brain neurons. When she attacks the healthy human can coma immediately. Thus shown that, we as human still lack of knowledge if compare to the His mighty God Power whose manage the universe.

Then when my wife was taken to the operating room, I could only say, " Oh my Lord Allah, I just prey and seek for your help to safe my lovely wife " That expression of words that can be uttered upon  seeing my wife in a coma situation brought by a nurse to operation  theater.

When my wife had disappeared from my sight when operating theater doors closed, my  mind recalls daydreaming about my beloved wife who was so faithful to  myself. Well proven her sincerity of love and affection for her husband and  family when I was hospitalized in 1983, due to my right knee pain.

“ My Love let me do everything, it is my responsibility to take care of your until your fully recovered later" My lovely wife told me nearly 30 years before, during that time I just discharge from hospital after  been  hospitalize about 6 months.  with a  Plaster of Paris (POP) for one year, which is proof of his love. It's all a memory that never goes out in my mind ever since 1983 before until now and forever.

And now my love loyalty to wife is tested, would God have ordained all of this as a countervailing   test his love toward us. Allah only know the perfect answer.

I still remembered how my wife prove her   is a good and honest to husband. She   keeps her husband wholeheartedly without any grumbling and groaning. She able to do everything, washing feces, urine cleaning, bathing and other sundries.  Thanks to God that gave me a mate with a woman who is honest and kind-hearted.  That evidence innocence love my wife.

" Sir " I snapped out of daydreaming, when I hear the voice of a  nurse. " Your wife is going for operation within 3 to 4 hours, sir can wait in the lobby there. When you've finished I'll call ". She said with a smile. I just looked at the nurse with empty heart.

In the waiting room sofa, my mind was still flying around daydreaming about the future of our family. The future is uncertain, whether hot or drizzle or single storm, I cannot make predictions, because there are no tools to measure as usual done for Weather Forecast through Radar system. Because it involving an soul, living or dead is He who determines the Almighty and Omnipotent. God Is The Greatest!

The wife is undergoing surgery today is not sure what will be the end, Is she be OK or the kinds of situations that are unclear, and missed. "O Allah, You may be able to save my wife keeps us together", "God willing," replied my mind alone.

While waiting for my wife out of the operation theater, my thoughts still haunt the times themselves are gripped, and how to take care of my lovingly and loyalty wife.

" Abang, your  has more than eight months recuperating at home," my wife told me one afternoon.

"When the time you can properly walk" asked my wife who was still lying in a reclining chair.

 "I do not know darling, it's up to the will of God. Abang just accept it. "

The situation was still visible in my mind,  I still remember everything, how my  wife facing the trials when my right knee seriously hurt  in the 80s before.

She remained loyal despite myself already categorized as a disabled husband. Where it does not, right foot only be  moved about 25%, resulting of the pain, I having to walk like a person wearing a prosthetic leg. From this time I began to see myself as a disabled person, when  performing Solat ( prayer) while sitting between two prostrations and ‘tahayyat’  beginning and end, my  right leg had to be brought straight  forward, that again the normal way. 

"Unfortunately  I can accept as they are, That the takdir gifted by Lord Allah.” I told to my wife one afternoon after being discharged from the hospital one time ago.

"Unfortunately you  not regret marrying me " I  used to say to my wife after my right knee pain does not heal completely, my right leg was not function normally, have a disability.

"What was sorry, because during the first married Abang  was handsome, as  Ametha Baachan  a Hindi movie star,  hee..he ,,,,," jokes my wife,

"Well, really that" I question back  to ensure my wife sincerity.

"If  abang  do not believe, it's OK," wife looks a bit sad in her face.

That is an old story in early of  80s. Sweet love destined us only lasted three years, then everything magnificently.   Husband and wife very romantic.    Happy always lived with our family.

Everything has been so memorable in the history of our marriage.

That's all I can face with full conviction and persevere because God had destined, perhaps in retaliation for the sins of my past faulty or to test my faith and devotion to Him. Time passed quickly, and I had to accept the fact that my  wright  leg pain as a destiny that God has given  to me and my family. Nevertheless our loyalty and happiness intact as before.

Now I still love to my wife in God's test. What is happening now as a test of our love and loyalty. Is it really true faithful as we talked during the first time  my wife and I met before. Is able to withstand the pain wife might be paralyzed and unable to speak after this operation.

” Your wife may be paralyzed one side of the body. She also may be cannot talk due to shortening of her tongue” 

Neuron Surgeon told me when he try to explained to me before I was asked to sing the acceptance latter for operation. 

I just hear the doctor words. What can be done in a panic situation, life or death which is not certain and still to find the best way to resolve. What is the most important for me is how my wife's life can be saved. May she continue to breeze the fresh air, and she still can be my partner to release stress of the day, or she can be the venue for my sons and daughters to tell their stories. Nevertheless she is the persons to make my grandchildren laughing. Only to Allah that I submit all hopes and everything. We can do nothing.

Clock in the waiting room shown 10:30 am. I still eagerly awaiting the results of my wife surgery, have not shown any further news from the theater. Wait and still waiting.

In the meantime, I still cannot accept the fact that my beloved wife  who was a top aide to me in rowing our family life,  has now taken the pleasure by the Almighty. She was in a coma, and need immediate surgery to save her life.   After the operation is not yet sure what her health situation. Whether recoverable or not, can continue to breathe or stopped? It is also uncertain, myself just surrender all possibilities to Allah SWT.

I still matter-questions in my mind, if my fault that God's self test  this  with various allegations from period to contemporary. Could this be a way to test the level of my faith and devotion. This issue can not answer with certainty. Wallahualam, whatever cause just surrender  to Him.

                                                                                                                

The events that took place over the wife,  has major teaching and awareness of myself and also to  our family members. Where there is a sudden, a healthy wife was pulled favor immediately. Continue coma in the hospital during treatment of headache pain which I consider as normal pain, The doctor said so.

" Do not worry, Your wife just has a headache, She will be O.K. after the treatment given "the doctor said to me when I sent my wife to the clinic of treatment.

But the fact that the future events of every man is not completely sure, we can only make predictions. That determine everything is God. Well proven again that we humans are not actually what's up, what power and strength. Everything is a gift and a loan from the Almighty Allah. Allah hu Akhbar! We are not what's up, what, everything that God has.

to be continue.........