Preface : LOVE TILL HEAVEN

Praise be to Allah, Peace and Blessings be upon Prophet Muhammad  S.A.W. and his companions R.A.

A marriage built on the basis of truly love and  all the happiness in the surf boat life in this world and hereafter. The ultimate goal of marriage is a love and  relationship that is built on this earth can be forwarded up to heaven. It sounds pretty simple, but very complicated and challenging journey to achieve.

When two couples united in a marriage, it has increased the responsibilities that have to be borne more than the current single week. That is the sole responsibility of the partner. Failure to exercise this responsibility will result in one spouse is a colossal catastrophe reserve in the hereafter and will be sentence to the hell.

Too much if you want to be the responsibility. Supposedly it will be a book and can not be satisfied with just reading the article, which is very limited knowledge. But the Malay saying goes, "No cane root was useful". The benefits will only be obtained when we practice all the knowledge that we know. Not the quantity of knowledge that is required, otherwise the quality. Grace and help of God will only attend to those who are with righteousness and good deeds rather than by itself. That is, Allah will be with mankind who to be compassionate, muttaqin (taqwa), righteous (doing good) and so on.

This personal habit resulting from the practice of self-righteousness as solemn worship, practice circumcision, studying and so on. Therefore, we never find the verse "Allah is with those who worship, fast, give alms, etc.," but God will be with gift the personal appearance  righteousness that is inside.

Among the most important factor is the observance of domestic harmony. Radiollah Ali once said, "If a wife is to obey her husband, then one foot has stepped into the heavens. The other will step up if he did keep the commandments. " In this case, the second submission must be made of obedience to God and obedience to the husband.

In the event that adherence to the commandments, is not much different whether the woman becoming the wife or unmarried. A woman still needs to implement the law as cover themselves, dignity, perform rituals and practices of circumcision and so on. But, when a woman was considered a wife's status, the most common practice circumcision does, he will have to adjust to the situation so as not to collide with the wishes of her husband with other words she has to please her husband desire and need.

A woman should ask her husband's permission if you want to perform fasting (for compliment fast not the necessary fast Ramadan) . Feared would interfere with his responsibilities towards her husband than avoid misunderstandings that would threaten the harmony of the household. Circumcision practices such as prayer, reading the Koran and so can be done when all the household responsibility has been completed. This is because a wife should be prepared any time required to serve her husband especially to fulfill of his sex requirement that is one of the most important wife obligation the her husband.

Regarding obedience to the husband, it just covers the all aspect of life not violate Islamic law. If the husband told to do illegal things, then it is not obliged to obey even haram to cooperate. The Prophet S.A.W. said, "There is no obedience to the creature in disobedience to God's doing." One thing that needs to be explored and explained here, a lot of things change according to circumstances. For example, in the case of obeying the husband, although originally the law to do something that is a must, but if requested by her husband, then she has turned into a must. If there is no reason to make calls syar'ie wife to obey her husband's request, then the wife is going to bear the blame.

For example, cooking and washing is not the responsibility of a wife, but if requested by the husband and he has the responsibility for her in carrying out her husband's request. In this case, the husband and wife can discuss whether to tolerate the conduct of rotating assignments, or even hire a maid, etc. If there is no valid excuses, for example, the wife is a housewife and a healthy body, then it is obligatory for the wife to obey her husband's request. Conversely, if the wife works or have health problems, it is necessary to talk to the husband to find the alternative solution, The  husband  should not misunderstand and cause of sin to a wife who refuses to do so.

The husband is the head of the household. When the wife is the manager who manages the household according to the needs and desires of her husband. No matter what their social status, did not prevent the wife to respect and fulfill the right accordingly.  Understanding of marriage will only exist when the husband and wife understand and fulfill the one right  against the couple. The right is more important for a wife to obey her husband is. Without obedience, then understanding can not exist.

When a woman realizes the power of her husband as head of the family, respect for self and pleasure will exist. By the nature of this marriage to wife will shape the way that pleases God.

The Prophet S.A.W. said, "O women! Charity because I have seen the woman is the most crowded of the Fire. "When asked why they become the dwellers of the public, he said," You're a lot of cursing and are ungrateful to your husbands and your husband. "

Humble heart in order to obey her husband. Do we put the ego in it should not be. Too many divorce cases are caused by a wife who is too clever to refer to her husband. Even the husband is seen as useless junk.

There also are embarrassed with the social status of husband who worked and underpaid. As a result of underestimating her own husband, the wife has to find a way out by having an affair with another man. Cursing her own husband has become common among women. Even shamelessly tell the husband and wife to all friends. The family institution has become more fragile.

The husband also only be able to pack and pack a nod to his wife's request. As a result, instead of husband and wife the husband's guiding hand has been led by the nose by his wife.    Any wife order totally  accepted without suspicion and questioning. No one has a bit of suspicion, as it will create care attitude and not take for granted the couple. Confidence in total only eligible to Allah and His Prophet S.A.W and not to others.

It should be viewed with one wife are friends. If his friend had a bad attitude, so far as possible to advise the wife to stay away. This is because the friend with a bad attitude will affect her friend, either directly or indirectly.

In the era of globalization, the very need of transparency in the relationship. Too much cheating that occurs even in their own homes. A wife who allegedly was righteous and did not leave the house, maybe do things quite devastating in their own homes. Too many porn picture featuring women veiled taken in the bedroom, when their husband to give to his mistress. Originally simply a virtual chat friends, however, due to the inverse relationship that accompanied bad intentions, then the result is very bad. They cant achieve  their sex requirement .

All issues must be resolved. Stay only we want to do it or not. The world's problems will be solved with the next practice. We need to instil confidence in the practice of religion itself. The Prophet said, "The world was created for you and you were created for eternity." Religious practices conducted with sincerity and confidence will guarantee success for us in this world and hereafter.

A husband is obliged to ensure the religious level in marriage. The first person to be educated with no religion other than his own wife. When the wife was practicing with confidence and sincerity, then surely the kids will be educated to religion and good morals. As a result of a relationship that is founded by religious beliefs of the family makes it overflows with mercy and blessings of Allah Almighty will pose sustenance, all the problems will be solved and every day will be filled with compassion and love. Happy living will be accomplish.

According to Islamic  way of life. Husband and wife play important role in shaping their families with wright track. Husband must show his responsibility to guide and command the whole family until they all can follow the truth that was introduced. And also be a good  Koran Reciter. In another words if the husband manage to control and manage as caregiver to handicap  wife. If the husband that was tested by God with difficulties and sorrow and hardship, unfortunately he manage to go through with difficulties and able to succeed and leave happily with his wife and their family, this type of husband can be selected an example excellent husband.

To ensure either he is truly good husband or otherwise, they must be tested with difficulty and a lot of obstacle a the way long starting from the first night of marriage and continuously leave happily when they was given number of kids.  This tested with hardship will shown the ability of husband or wife how their action plan to handle and facing all the obstacle from time to times. Strong and gentlemen  husband manage to find a good solution how to go about until he can achieve their family aim or goal.

The good husband will do his best to take care his wife if she was attacked by permanent illness. Such as attack by major stroke that will prolong their sickness and took same times to cure. The good husband who admit their role will take necessary action to give a best care if his wife been attack by stroke. The husband will be take special attention as a stroke caregiver, even thought it will take longer time of a few years to recover back. This is not the essay jobs to do, He need a kind of passion personality, committed with his  responsible as been warrant by God when he was answer “Yes I accept the marriage”. The time on wards all the responsibility of her father absolutely been burden to the husband. This very responsible task by husband  can be only achieved by truly understand his responsibility and commit to fulfill all his obligation as the obedience person to Allah. This is the key success of myself experience of taking care my stroke wife for more then 15 years till now.

The strong obligation and commitment to fulfill my duties and responsible to my Lord. It make me more dedicated to take over the role of house wife. That mean all the  house wife job I personally to do and make sure I can performed politely. This cannot be achieve If myself not fully know the role and responsible of a husband. This knowledge must be learn by all husband as the head of household and  also as the leader for the examples to his wife and family. I can do that properly and  success by the skill and knowledge I was acquire from time to time. Because in the real life we must acquire knowledge and skill as main obligation (fardu ain) as been taught by Islamic faith. Thus one of the important factor to able you to face challenge and obstacle in the life as husband and wife. If you as a good husband can do the task properly, your can be award as an example husband and a few selected people can achieved this status.

Happy reading.

A praise to My Lord as this book will be one of source of knowledge that can be read by the husband in attending his duties success fully and will be award with  pahala by Allah in the next life in the day after.

May Allah chose us to continue to be above way. Insyaallah.

Amin.  

NIK RAIHAN NIK ABD RAH MAN
PANJI KOTA BHRU 
KELANTAN MALAYSIA
1 SEPTEMBER 2015